I am sick and tired of going through the same fucking round-trip of bad memories and analysis. I am sick and tired. I am tired of going through the same bullshit. Over and over. Same bullshit. All the time. I am sick and fucking tired of going through the same meaningless bullshit in my head for months, years. I am sick and tired. Paragraphs are useless because paragraphs are for information separated neatly and sensibly, made easy to read. This is not sensible. This is pointless torture. Helps noone. There is no reason to go over the same pointless analysis and self-evaluation for years over something bad that happened ONCE YOU FUCKING DICKHEAD, get over it.

Due to being recently unemployed, I am giving bass lessons. 25 euro per hour of lesson, or less depending on your ability to pay. If you or anyone you know is looking for lessons from someone who really knows his stuff about the bass guitar, let me know. Comment here or email ericpatrick.burke@googlemail.com . Thank you very please.

~Eric.

Drum sequencing is up and running. Nothing else to do except learning. And riffing. Heavy music ahoy.

I set myself a reminder a few days ago to write a blog about something really silly that people sometimes do when discussing all sorts of affairs. The very same evening, I ended up having a conversation with someone where they did EXACTLY the thing mentioned. The silly thing I'm talking about is giving their personal opinion that x is true there is clear documentation - evidence - that it is not true.

This discussion, briefly, was about drink driving. I was asked by Chap A would I drive after having one drink. I said absolutely not; even a small amount of alcohol affects your ability to drive. At this point, Chap B states that he would be fine to drive after one drink, that he would drive more carefully because he had had a drink. At this point, the conversation became a fruitless and very frustrating clash of common sense with stupidity. I tried to explain to him that for the purposes of what we were discussing, or at least at the level we were then discussing it at, opinion was entirely irrelevant. Even a small amount of drink, even if well below the legal limit, makes it much more likely that you'll have an accident. This has been proven and documented thoroughly many times. His response was the same 'I think I would be fine', and questioning where these facts came from, that he had never heard of them. It doesn't take much googling to find them.

Now, if we had both accepted the proven facts about drink driving, perhaps we could discuss our opinions on it from there. But without accepting basic facts, it's a waste of time.

I used to let my personal prejudices affect my view on some things for which there were also simple proven facts. I realised how silly that was and I now just accept the facts, even if I don't like what follows from that (paraphrasing Chomsky).

I've no idea what happened in my head tonight, but look at what I wrote down:

IRELAND CAN BE MY WIFE
----------------------
Berlin can be my mistress, my occasional affair, my on-off lover.

It seems appropriate. 'Cause I don't think I could live anywhere but Ireland 'til I die (I think), but other places could be used to put the wind up me, put the fire in me.

I feel really good. I feel focused. I see all the possibilities of what I could do and be involved in. Exponentially greater than what they could have been before.

Anyone, ANYONE who wants to visit Berlin for a weekend and wants me to show them around the place, give me a shout. I will take you.

~Chi Cheng Burke.

In Ireland, I've heard it said many times that 'the Leaving Cert will determine your future'. (The Leaving Cert being the set of exams a student takes at the end of secondary school typically at the age of 17 or 18, before entering college or the working world.) This can be demonstrated by the ridiculous level of media coverage at Leaving Cert time. National papers have entire sections dedicated to helping students do well. On the days of the exams themselves, you will know from television and radio coverage if there was one question on one of the maths papers that was considered too difficult or a trick question, and people will become outraged enough for it to ALMOST become a real issue.

The enormous, life-changing importance associated with this set of academic tests says a lot about Irish society in general, and possibly about many Western/developed countries' societies. There are two obvious assumptions I can see, one more important than the other.

The first is that, for career oriented people at least, how well you do in the Leaving Cert determines what job or career you will have for the rest of your life, by virtue of deciding which college courses you can get into. (Irish colleges accept students into a course according to points achieved, which vary depending on the course desired. The top x number of students based on Leaving Cert results are accepted into a course, typically. So, the more people that want to do a particular course, the more Leaving Cert points required. This system goes for the majority of college courses.) Now, there might be some value to this assumption, since many employers demand a college qualification, sometimes if it's not even related to the position applied for. But in general, it undermines a person's natural capacity to learn without institutional education.

I have a degree in Computer Science, and I would consider myself okay at computers after four years in a university. But I am also a musician, for nearly the same length of time, and I am far better at music than computers, despite never having a music lesson in my life. It simply comes down to the fact that I am far better suited to music than computers. I am confident that I could easily play music professionally or teach it. The point here is that college should not be the be all and end all of attaining skills that qualify you to do something. The main factor should be what you can demonstrate your ability at, and that it is very possibly to become competant at something without college or university.

It's quite possible to go through a college course with no passion for the subject, motivated instead by prestige. An increasing number of Irish college goers do this, demonstrated by the fact that while overall levels of people in Ireland going to college is decreasing, more and more are applying to Trinity College Dublin in particular, which is traditionally viewed as the best or more prestigious college.

But the second and more important assumption is that if the Leaving Cert determines the rest of your life by virtue of determining what career or job you can pursue, then your career or your job is your life. What's happened to us? Since when did we decide that something as one dimensional as an occupation defined something as complex and spiritual as a human? When did we decide the purpose of life was to earn a title? And how little self esteem do we then have? When did we stop living and start merely surviving?

I just wanna find somewhere near woods, so I can find them at night. Wander around them in darkness, seeing with whatever light is naturally available. Sleeping trees. I'd do it at the Navan gaff, but the trees beside us have been chopped down for the M3, and there are none left. I suppose it would be best to find someone who lives near some woods and get them to agree to wander with me from some point at night maybe 'til dawn if we're not exhausted. (Any takers? I wouldn't cause no trouble, mister..)

Just wanna wander woods in darkness. I miss stuff like that. I miss nature and night-time and stars and deep, thick clouds.

Apologies for lack of entires recently. It's mainly due having no of proper internet access. I have plenty of thoughts to put down, I just need to time to arrange and post them. Stay tuned for a rant about sexism in music.

~Chi Cheng Burke.

There was a time where I let my ego be fed by people saying how 'nice' I was. I've only recently realised (or realised again) how meaningless that is. If you were to tell someone (me included) what they didn't want to hear for their benefit, it probably wouldn't make you too popular with them.

"An error does not become truth by reason of multiplied propagation, nor does truth become error because nobody sees it. Truth stands, even if there be no public support. It is self sustained." - Gandhi

I'm starting to think music is a piece in a puzzle of a deep peace. A realisation of the unity of everything. That everything there is is just a wave form, and we can melt into it if we feel it right.

Why is it that when you listen to music your mood changes? I think it's more accurate to say that you become focused, rather than a mood change. It's like a revelation. When listening to music, you can concentrate on it, focus your mind one hundred percent on it. It is a spiritual experience. And not in a hocus pocus way. In the sense of 'in the spirit of..'. A focusing of truth and meaning. Education. Schools won't teach you the truth about indoctrination and culturelessness. So it must be disseminated through other channels. So that we all can fight the power. And to be strong enough to fight the power, we must take strength from deep inside.

And this is where the spirituality of things like music and other arts come in. Only, like I said, I believe music is only a part of that puzzle. Similar focus can be felt from less conspicuous things. I believe such depth can also be drawn from sight, from hearing sound of a non-human musical nature. From even just thought. From nature, from man made things, from darkness.

Where noise intended to distract us quiets, comes through a beautiful noise of the Earth speaking to us. It bore us, and even though we have pulled ourselves away from it with distractions of a material and hollow nature, we can always fall emotionally back into it.